Travel Companion

Whether you have a copilot, best friend, or significant other tagging along, it’s important to know a few fundamental protocols when traveling with others. The first thing to acknowledge, is that neither of you are in familiar territory anymore, and you’re both far from home. Recognizing that should set off a cascade of cognitive functions. If not, well, I’m glad you’re here. I’ll help you.

Biologic Importance

There is a difference whether you’re traveling as, or with, a male or female. This matters, believe it or not. Contrary to the perfect world some of us believe we live in, there are very serious realities that divide the sexes.

For instance, a very high percentage of men comprise the trucking industry; and of them, even they face dangers which make them victims. Be they assaults, violence, murder, theft; the men within that industry have faced it.

Biologically, based on chromosomes XX and XY, determine how a body will grow, distribute fat or muscle, and cognitively respond to stimuli. Men are XY, and that means they produce far greater amounts of testosterone which enables them to grow and maintain a much higher muscle mass than that of their female counterparts. 

Another result of testosterone in men, is an increased logic function, rather than emotive; to which their female counterparts naturally employ more often initially than scrutinously scouring details for a stone cold solution. In short: Men are stronger, and keep a cooler head in stressful situations. This is why men, and not women, have in large majority, been sent to war for thousands of years; comprise the majority of the trucking industry; and why men appear more "cold" and women more "caring".

A simple cross-analysis of the given data will corroborate my information.  Click the images to learn more.  Now that I have the science and historical record accounted for, I may proceed without being taken out of context.

Stealth Intelligently

Unfortunately, women are the low hanging fruit of the road, ripe and ready to pick from any would-be assailant. For this reason, unfortunately, I advise females dress robustly. It’s easier in the winter, because you can add layers to simulate mass that isn’t there. Trust me, when I was in vocational school for my Class A trucking certification and license, my teacher was a woman and former trucker, and this advice comes from her.

“Dress like a man” she would tell the ladies of the class. She made no pretense about it, women are easier victims on the road. The sooner you fall in line with this reality, the safer you and your companion will be.

Two men traveling together won’t have as much to worry about. So going forward, I will be speaking about two female travel companions, and male and female traveling companions alike, to be assumed interchangeably throughout.

Sure giveaways to be mindful of are:

• Long hair
• Hips and small waist
• Breasts

I know men who were mistakenly thought to be women, simply because they had long hair, and their back was turned.  The appearance of long hair is socially synonymous with femininity first, and rock and roll second.  Don't feel ashamed of having to cover up; it's considered prudence when venturing into unknown areas filled with unfamiliar people and cultural nuances. 

Don't be naive, and don't place yourself in a position where you could be endangering your male companion.  There's a good time and a good place to show off and be yourself; traveling on the road isn't the time or place, but rather, the destination.  Perhaps you're heading to a resort, or a beach.  Sensitivity over this means even a momentary life on the road probably isn't for you. 

You must adopt the perspective that you're protecting yourself and your personal interests.  It is exactly akin to withholding your home address from total strangers.  You don't know who to trust on the open road, so you must take precautions.  You are traveling outside of the bubble of certainty and familiarity, and in a word: Home.

When I travel, I don't "look myself" either, and I make sure that all I am wearing fills two requirements:

1. Comfort
2. Pragmatism

I keep my "me" clothes in a suitcase, and put them on once I get to where I'm going; usually to see someone I know.  If your plan is to travel aimlessly without visiting a friend, that's acceptable, but just know that you'll be in your traveling attire nearly all the time. I'll talk more about what to wear on the road for another page topic.

Remain Near

Always travel together as though you’re joined at the hip. Never let the other out of sight, at least not for very long. If one is staying behind with the vehicle because they’re sleeping, or some other reason, take care to lock the vehicle before you leave them there. Make sure to hurry back. If your companion is sleeping, don’t leave the keys in the ignition with them locked inside. Since they can let themselves out of the vehicle if it becomes too hot, or too cold, there isn’t a need to risk them being left alone with the running vehicle. The risk being, someone jumping in and stealing the vehicle while your companion sleeps. It’s really a judgment call for you, whether the engine is running or not, always make sure to lock all the doors before you leave the vehicle to protect your companion—not to mention, the rest of the property on board.

Remain Connected

When you’re both wandering on foot and exploring, whether it’s in a city or open plains of the Midwest—stay together. The consequences of becoming separated could be dire. At a minimum, make sure you both have cell phones, fully charged, with volume up. Consider getting long range walkie talkies, and agree to code names in advance, in the event that you enter a dead zone, and cell phone reception isn’t available. There are vast gaps in service out on the road. I’ve been through them. Keeping communication links alive is paramount with your companion.

Trust & Prior Agreements

If you’re a male traveling with a female companion, then there are certain things you’ll have to be aware of. For instance, she might need to stop and use the bathroom more often. She can’t “hold it in” as long, and she may also be menstruating. When she tells you to stop, make sure you do as soon as safely possible. She also needs to alert you ahead of time, to allow you to find a safe place to stop.

In a similar vein, you both need to reciprocate trust on a constant basis.  Know when the jokes end, and when allegiance begins.  This is crucial while traveling the big road; you're confined in a small box for hours, and may find yourselves in unplanned situations.  Have a conversation and establish agreements before going to the road.  Trust should be intuitive enough, but there are some other considerations that will help harmonize the vibes between you.

Cockpit Etiquette

1. Agree on certain types of music ahead of time.
   
2. Agree to let the driver be the DJ, unless the driver expressly forgoes that right. It must also be agreed that music shall not be played when the companion is attempting to sleep. Audio books may be an alternative compromise, because it’s sometimes easier to fall asleep to a narrator than music. The driver will have something to keep their mind engaged from highway hypnosis(it’s a real thing, look it up), and the companion/passenger may be lulled to sleep.
3. Thou shall not fart before rolling down the window first.
4. Collect trash in a small plastic bag, so as not to litter the vehicle and encumber the space being shared. Toss the trash in a receptacle when stopped at a rest area or gas station. Don’t litter.
5. Figure out ahead of time who controls the bank. A good method is staggered refueling, staggered meal payments, etc. Every other time you stop for these things, you pay for it, and respectively for your companion. Someone will always end up paying a little bit more—but splitting hairs over dollars and cents isn’t in the spirit of friendship, or adventure.
6. Keep dirty laundry in a garbage bag in the cargo area or trunk. Cut down on the funk.
   
7. Stop and grab a shower from a truck stop, or a national gym you might be a member of. Brush your teeth every day, chew gum; this especially helps cut down on your appetite. The more you eat/drink while driving, the more often you’ll be searching for a bathroom. Don’t misconstrue this with not eating or drinking at all; you should be stopping every couple of hours to walk around and stretch.  There are two main reasons for this: Blood clots, and Road Constipation. I’ll go more in depth about that in the Health Section.
8. Agree to begin searching for a fuel station when the tank reaches half empty. You don’t want to sabotage the road trip inadvertently over a misjudged fuel tank. Burn half, then search with half. I’ve used that rule in all my travels, and it never fails. Sometimes it still comes close! There are expanses of road so great that you’ll take a quarter tank just to find anywhere to stop at all. Make sure you and your copilot know the refueling intervals.
9. No long cell phone conversations.  This could be a distraction to the driver, annoying, and ostracizing.  Keep them down to 15 minutes, unless you're checking-in with family, and/or your companion clears you for an endless call-- ask first.
   
10. Use earbuds to play handheld games, or turn the volume off--this includes games on your cell phone.
    

Note:

This is a Rule Set for you and your companion to respect each other with.  If you have not read the Traveler's Doctrine, I recommend doing so, as that is your promised and esteemed regard for the world outside of Cockpit Etiquette.

Identifying Fatigue

If you’re in the passenger seat and your companion is driving, and she looks tired, but tells you with confidence that she isn’t, insist you switch seats, or just simply pull over at the next safest stop for rest. This understanding should be communicated before the trip.

There are times when your face will begin to show signs of fatigue, like a warning. It’s a good practice to occasionally check your facial appearance in the mirror for fatigue, such as; heavy eyes, bloodshot or red eyes, slack jaw, shallow breathing, dark circles beneath eyes. I have done this, and much to my surprise, I’d look exhausted. I wouldn’t drive for much longer when I’d see that face, and make it a point to pull over for rest at the next safest place to park. I often found sleep quickly.

Don’t overestimate yourself.  Falling asleep at the wheel is a death sentence. Take it seriously. Don’t drive tired. It has the same physiological effects as driving intoxicated, you can look it up.

Many years ago, I had a relative who fell asleep behind the wheel, and when she crashed, she killed her husband, decapitating him.  She survived.  Heed this lesson: Don't drive tired.